On a steamer Bound for Baltimore, I said that's no fun I've been there before
So I jumped ship near Singapore with a cook from Mexico
I got me a bowl of Shark-fin soup, I ducked into a bar for a couple of scoops
Played some Texas stud with a circus troop, and they cleaned me out of dough
Cleaned me out of Dough!

(Chorus)
Don't Let the Truth, get in the way of a good story
No harm, No foul, No crime
Don't Let the Truth, get in the way of a good story
It'll get'em every time
At dawn they all went back to bed, so I went to Borneo instead
Had a hair-of-the dog from me shrunken head, with the Sultan of Brunei
Had a small bit of a seizure, on the way to Micronesia
Got a bad case of Amnesia, and forgot to say goodbye
Forgot to say goodbye!

(Chorus)
Stopped in Tajikistan, On the way to Iran
I Took a break in Jamaica, to work on my tan
I surfed from Cayo Fragoso to Carriacou
I climbed Machu-Picchu in Darkest Peru
Had a pint with the pope and played pool with the Queen
I swam circles drawn to synchronize a swimmin' team
I once had a job riding bulls in Montana
I taught Jimmy Hendrix the Star-Spangled Banner
Moved to Morocco, Malawi, Macau
I know how to fly, but I won't tell you how
I've been to Morocco, Malawi, Macau
I know how to fly, but I won't tell you how!
(Chorus)
I bought a nice-cold coca-cola, from a Congolese high-rula
That deported from Angola, To a castle on the Rhine
Ask anyone that knew me, The Emir of Bahrain sued me
I was in some Blockbuster movie, but I didn't make a dime!

(Chorus)
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