They showed up on my doorstep
Just a couple weeks ago
They looked so sweet and harmless
Tell me, how was I to know
They got a little too close to the microwave
And then much to my surprise
They grew to forty thousand times their original size
They started mutatin' right before my eyes, oh my

Attack of the radioactive hamsters from a planet near Mars
A race from a distant place
They came in UFOs shaped just like Cuban cigars
Man oh man, you oughta hear 'em squeal
Now the whole wide world is their exercise wheel
Attack of the radioactive hamsters from a planet near Mars

The president, he's is a panic
The Pentagon, they're in shock
There's a team of research scientists
They got 'em workin' 'round the clock
Now the National Guard is out in my backyard
And the Marines'll be comin' around
I hope they get this lousy rodents out of my town
Cause the property values are goin' way down now

Attack of the radioactive hamsters from a planet near Mars
They're back and they're lookin' for a snack
And they're not that fond of Burger Kings or salad bars
I hope they're not plannin' to stay
Who invited them here anyway
Attack of the radioactive hamsters from a planet near Mars