Some folks live a single life so lonely
Thank god I've got you and you've got me
But if we had a pass for one night only
Who'd be on your list, who'd be on your list?
I'll give you three

[Courtney]
I'll take Rob Lowe, DiCaprio, and Denzel

[Stephen]
I'll take Anne Hathaway, Beyonce, and Denzel

[Stephen]
Why you looking at me funny?
You don't think Anne Hathaw--

[Courtney]
What the fuck?

[Stephen]
I'm man enough to say Denzel's a honey
Also, I'm sorry, but I don't subscribe to the heteronormative idea that human sexual expression is binary and one is either gay or straight, but rather that one's orientation is more fluid and most people identify between the two extremes on the continuum, so if I saw Denzel at, like, an airport and he winked at me and walked into a bathroom stall we both know I would follow him inside

[Courtney]
Anyway...
[Together]
Jon Snow, and Barack O. and Denzel
Give me some, Rachel Dratch, and Cumberbatch, and Denzel
And Denzel (x5)

[Stephen (Courtney)]
And Kristen Bell (and Denzel)
And Chuck Lidell (and Denzel)
Barbara Mandrell (and Denzel)

Denzel (oh Denzel)

(lot's of "Denzel" ad-libbing)

Denzel, Denzil, and Lin-Manuel
Denzel (Denzil), Denzil (Denzil), and Geri Haliwell
Ohhhhhh, I Love you Big D
Ohhhhhh, You're the one for me

(unintelligible)
Patti LeBelle
Norman Fell
And mother fuckin' Steve Carrell
Dave Chapelle
Richard Hell
And Kenan and also Kel
Gisele
That's swell
Harvey Keitel
Denzel