[Intro]
Come back DJ
Your record is scratched

[Verse 1]
Come back DJ
What's wrong with this track?
This ain't no cutting-edge groove
It's the needle skipping back
Everybody's got disrhythmia
This breakbeat's so confusing
They'll think the latest batch of 'E'
Been cut with jazz-fusion

[Verse 2]
Come back DJ
Getting ugly in here
There's no more bottled water
They're starting in on beer
Everybody's coming down
It'll be a free-for-all
Any more freestyling
They'll be wanting Aussie Crawl

[Chorus]
Come back DJ, come back DJ
Your record is scratched
Come back DJ, come back DJ
Your record is scratched
[Samples: Frankie Davidson & Carl Douglas]
That's right, that's right, I'm sad and blue
Everybody was kung fu fighting
I'm lost, I'm lost, can't do my thing
Everybody was kung fu fighting
That's right, that's right
Everybody was kung fu fighting
I'm lost, I'm lost
And in fact it was a little bit frightening
That's right, that's right
Everybody was kung fu fight–
Everybody was kung fu fight–
Everybody was kung fu fighting
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh

[Verse 3]
Come back DJ
They'll suss why you came
Double-decking in the cubicle
With DJ underage
When they find out what you are
How bad's it gonna get?
You never hung with Nik Fish
And all your friends were mullets
What you know 'bout gabber?
You learned watching the test?
You flew in from Ibiza?
Nah, the bus from Airport West
Come back DJ
I'll admit I'm scared
Hurry, put your cans back on
They've started lobbing theirs
There's something way too feral
'Bout this tribal gathering
I think De Rigueurmortis
Has started setting in
They've stormed the stage
They're at your booth
But you're still out the back
With some private school girl
Doing blow with slim boy's fat
[Chorus]
Come back DJ, come back DJ
Your record is scratched
Come back DJ, come back DJ
Your record is scratched
Come back DJ, come back DJ
Your record is scratched
Come back DJ, come back DJ
Your record is scratched

[Sample repeating: Carl Douglas]
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh

[Outro]
Yeah, alright, alright, that'll do