[Skit]
I've been a player in a punk rock band now for fourteen years
Look at you
And look at me, hahaha (Hahaha), look where I am

[Intro]
This song's about an amazing video game, it's called Pong
It goes somethin' like this, you ready to go? (It goes like this)

[Verse 1]
It's the gay nineties and you can't watch nothin' good
Mindless pinko garbage all they make in Hollywood
Kung Fu Theater, now there's a show with class
I'd like to find the guy who cancelled it and karate chop his ass
So after Alf is done, ain't nothin' else good on
All my rowdy friends come over because I have Pong, sing it

[Chorus]
Join us! (Come on) Join us! (Ahh)
Join us! Yеah, yeah, yeah, join us for Pong!

[Verse 2]
I got the foxеs, I got that clout
I got my unit on the day that they came out
You bring the snack treats, you bring the booze
I ain't bringin' nothin', does that box belong to you?
And "Pass the Dutchie"'s on, my all-time favorite song
Turn it down, you moron, we're tryin' to play Pong
[Chorus]
Join us! (Come on) Join us!
Join us! Yeah, yeah, yeah, join us for Pong!

[Verse 3]
Don't be fooled by world peace or an economy that's stable
The C.I.A.'s just got more time to watch you through your cable
They know your address, they send you the bill
They decide if you watch Tyson, don't that give you the chills?
Shake your shackles, son, only just begun
Got two speeds, what you need? Join us for Pong, sing it

[Chorus]
Join us! (Come on) Join us!
Join us! Yeah, yeah, yeah, join us for Pong!

[Instrumental Bridge]

[Chorus]
And we sing, join us! (Ahh) Join us! (Ahh)
Join us! Yeah, yeah, yeah, join us for Pong!

[Verse 4]
It's up to you to improve your hand-eye coordination
Or become a mindless puppet when they servin' out them— ahh
They know your address, send you bill
Decide if you watch Tyson, don't that give you the chills?
Now shake your shackles, son, only just begun
Two speeds you need, sing it
[Chorus]
Join us! (Come on) Join us!
Join us! Yeah, yeah, yeah, join us for Pong!

[Outro]
Yay, Pong!