/ / / missing

SADIE
​making profiles was fun—
​all these idealized avatar versions of myself
​but man, when it came to actually messaging with people
​i was a disaster

​my sense of humor was gone
​my style, spark, and spunk
​because i realized that now
​my entire sense of humor
​was based on life with jasmine

​so when i tried to make a joke
​i would realize that that joke
​was a joke i’d had with jasmine
​and so i would feel a fraud

​like i was betraying our secret language

SUSAN & BECKETT (alternating syllables)
​sometimes it feels like half of me is mis-sing
​sometimes it feels like half of me is gone

SADIE
​there were emojis i couldn’t use anymore
​devil, gekko, winkface…
​i tried getting into the new ones—
​leopard, sunflower, squid—
​but fuck the old ones were still the best ones, you know?
SUSAN & BECKETT
​sometimes it feels like half of me is mis-sing
​sometimes it feels like half of me is gone

SADIE
​times
​feels
​half
​me
​miss

​times
​feels
​half
​me
​gone

​so that’s an example of the kind of thing
​i learned you shouldn’t say while messaging someone on a ​dating app