[Refrain: Los Campesinos!]
Ooooh, ahhhh
Ooooh, ahhhh

[Verse 1: Gareth, Gareth & Aleks]
I restored your mother's faith in men whilst boring you to death
Left nothing more than a circle of stubble rash around your chest
My life was saved by a packet of nineteen cigarettes carried in my left breast pocket for a closest friend
A sleeping bag on the floor twists hips like buffalo horns
They said, "That boy is too lazy", you were clearly forewarned
A jealous ex silenced the room, he said that you were a whore
"Do you kiss your mummy's lips with that mouth?"

[Refrain: Los Campesinos!]
Ooooh, ahhhh
Ooooh, ahhhh

[Verse 2: Gareth, Gareth & Aleks]
She imagined everything I said in falsetto
The only way to justify my childish despair
I spent my last six-fifty in a public phone box
Graffitied genitalia from the ceiling to floor
Played reckless, rapid like a fruit machine
I see gargoyles in the floral of the duvet cover
You see melodrama move from one sentence to the other
And many years practice of speaking in hushed tones
[Instrumental]

[Spoken Outro: Tom]
He rattles his keys, but thats, um