Jon Cozart
RIP VINE: A Song (ft. Thomas Sanders)
[Jon:] You know, Thomas, there is nothing you could've done

[Thomas:]
How do I cope with this loss and this pain, Vine is now dead to me
People would soak in me narrating a 6 second masterpiece
Agony, beyond joking, don’t kid, when you 8 million fans, have to move to your Instagram vids

[Jon:]
Cooped up in L.A. I spent all my work days on painstaking art
Meanwhile my frenemies grow 9 times as quickly with taco bell hauls
Blah, blah, blah, blah-crunch, blah, blah
Agony, far more painful than yours when to grow like you want, you must pander the middle schoolers

[Both:] Agony, oh it hurts to the core!
[Jon:] What is as tiring
[Thomas:] Or half so inspiring
[Both:] As being ignored?
[Thomas:] Am I not talented with my impressions? My precious, Ms. Piggy, our family, I do the best Stewie, now where will they go?
[Jon:] You are everything Vine could have wished for!
[Thomas:] Oh, I know
[Jon:] It died though
[Thomas:] The platform is lost
[Jon:] You know nothing of losing 'til you only get 2 million views on a vid you know should have gone viral meanwhile, its lists: blah trump! Blah candy! Blah late night! Blah roasting! Blah blah!
[Both:] Agony
[Thomas:] Misery
[Jon:] Woe
[Both:] Though it's different for each
[Thomas:] Always seconds behind
[Jon:] Always decades too old!
[Both:] And it’s just out of reach!
Agony, that can cut like a knife! Hello, YouTube. Bye, Vine!