[Verse 1]
Met my girl on a dinner date
Uptown movie, not back too late
But saxophones and cocktails
Had other plans

[Chorus]
By Roland Kirk's three golden horns
Sol Invictus thrice reborn
Now I see the truth:
Jazz music corrupts our youth

[Verse 2]
Weaving to the men's restroom
Hallucinations red and blue
These pagan rites were too much
For the kid to bear

[Chorus]
By Roland Kirk's three golden horns
Sol Invictus thrice reborn
Now I see the truth:
Jazz music corrupts our youth
Turtlenecks and switchblade knives
Pointy shoes, back-alley dice
Oh, what's the use?
Jazz music corrupts our youth
[Instrumental Interlude]

[Verse 3]
On Slaughter Beach, it's daybreak now
My girl is nowhere to be found
Vibraphones and highballs
Made other plans

[Chorus]
By Roland Kirk's three golden horns
Sol Invictus thrice reborn
They speak the truth:
Jazz music corrupts our youth
Turtlenecks and switchblade knives
Business suits, back-alley dice
Oh, what's the use?
Jazz music destroys our youth