Jordan Rakei
Behind Closed Eyes
By the time my eyelids are weak
And my body jaded
This carefully constructed wall to keep out
My thoughts and the day is fading

As the sun disappears with it goes my resistance to you
Living in my mind
You appear
And I don’t have the strength to fight now

I play Amy’s tunes to sing me
Sweet to sleep
But suddenly I am consumed with grief

I begin to crave your touch
So I close my eyes and I buckle up
And with that (you lay beside me, your lips are smiling)
I gaze out (your complexion, free of rejection)
I decide (if I cannot love you while the sun shines)
I’ll settle for my dreams

I don’t have to guilt trip you
To make you wanna stay
Tonight you’ll just do it anyway
Desperately clinging on to this fantasy
As that forgotten warmth washes over me
You’re a drug and I’m withdrawal
Maybe dreams are my relapse
So I’ll at least enjoy these imaginary walls
Before morning comes and with the day collapse
In my fiction I erase
The notion of time
You ain’t in no rush
You’re just simply mine

No anxieties
No doubts
It’s just you and me again
The rest fades out

And with that
I gaze out
I decide
I’ll settle for my dreams

And then the alarm clock sounds
I am thrown right back to the ground
I just can’t face the truth
I hit the snooze
I just need my fix to cure reality’s blues

And with that (you lay beside me, your lips are smiling)
I gaze out (your complexion, free of rejection)
I decide (if I cannot love you while the sun shines)
I’ll settle for my dreams
I will settle for my dreams
I will settle for my dreams