[Intro]
Let’s go

[Chorus]
If you're a noob playing Halo: Reach
Don't be afraid, come on sing along with me (Yippee!)
When I'm on Xbox, I'm proud to say
I have no friends but I'll play online all day (Hooray!)

[Verse 1]
A little while back I had Hayabusa
But now I got a new thing I'm not used ta'
It's Halo: Reach, the game of my dreams!
How did this poop get into my jeans?
C'mon let's play, I'm ready to begin
Hey guys, let's fight, it's time to win!
God dammit Noob, why are you back again?
Because I love Halo and I love new friends!

[Pre-Chorus]
When I get the jetpack I will fly around
And I'll go up super high until somebody shoots me down
But I don't use active camo, I don't need to hide
'Cause I am a noob and I say that with pride
Let's sing!
[Chorus]
If you're a noob playing Halo: Reach
Come take a ride in this purple thing with me (Woohoo!)
We'll drive around shooting aimlessly
Gamers get pissed off 'cause I have not hit puberty (Not me)

[Verse 2]
Let's go camp, Skullkruncher13!
Why couldn't you've been on the other team?
But I got a DMR, so I can't be beat!
You idiot! That's long range weaponry!
Too late, I'm at the respawning screen
Now I have a gun that shoots some fuzzy blue things!
What a funny little gun! (Boom-boom-boom! Whee!)
Now somebody's T-bagging me!

[Pre-Chorus]
Oh, what would I would give to make this noob sign off
But you know I wouldn't do it 'till I'm told to by my mom!
And if you don't stop talking then I'll change my gamertag
Oh yes, please! If you do, then I will buy it and I would love that!
Fuck

[Chorus]
If you're a noob, then you're not alone
I'll be your buddy, together we'll get pwned! (Sure thing!)
If you get teabagged, don't you feel down
'Cause I'm a noob
And I am too!
Get up and make some sound! (Yeah!)
[Bridge]
Everyone in the lobby, listen now
If you always get knocked around
If you don't know what the campaign's about
Then you're a noob, stand up and shout
If you're really bad, but you don't have doubt
If you suck, but you try hard anyhow
If you're really high-pitched and totally proud
Then grab your Xbox mic and shout
"I am a noob! I am a noob!
I am a noob! And we like boobs!
I am a noob! I am a noob!"
Shut up! Shut up!
Every time you do one of those spontaneous songs you always get me to sing along somehow, but I'm not going to this time—

[Chorus]
If you're a noob, then you are the worst
I don't even know how Plasma Pistols work
I can't aim for shit and I don't know where to go
Life is hard for a noob in Halo

[Post-Chorus]
D'oh! Alright, you guys aren't so bad
Kick it one more time

[Chorus]
Yes, we are noobs and we're proud to be
I'm having fun even if my KDR is .03
If you're a useless pipsqueak on Halo: Reach
You can hit us up, and we'll all get buff buffed hard and happily
If you're a noob playing Halo: Reach
Don't be afraid c'mon sing along with me
'Cause we always follow the same routine
'Cause we go online, using all my time getting T-bagged endlessly!