[Verse 1]
(?)

[Chorus: Seth Putnam (?) and Seth Putnam Screaming]
If you like pina coladas
Getting caught in the rain (I do!)

[Verse 2]
(?)

[Chorus: Seth Putnam (?) and Seth Putnam Screaming]
If you like making love at midnight
In the dunes on the cape
Then I'm the love that I’ve looked for
Write to me and escape!

[Outro]
(Unintelligible / What sounds like pig squeals)