Beautiful Eulogy
Double Tap
[Verse]
Make sure the quarterly reports are packed inside my briefcase
Kiss the wife kiss the kids head out the rat race
Waving to my neighbors as I'm backing out the driveway
This is my routine it's how I always start up my day
IPod shuffling my smooth jazz playlist
Order ready at Starbucks because I'm on their A-list
Blue skies everywhere not a single cloud
And a couple of people getting eaten by a zombie crowd

That's right
We live in a world of zombie apocalypse
Playing hero gets you bit so I will not put a stop to this
They say that there's a process
To stop the zombie nonsense
If I'm honest
I've never been considered an optimist
So I
Keep my eyes on the path I'm takin'
And avoid the zombie horde so I don't get overtaken
If you take one step then drag a foot behind
Understand I won't be giving you a piece of my mind

[Hook]
We walk around so casual
And try to act real natural
As if we're stuck in a Norman Rockwell frame
But when your friends are plotting
Although all the skin is rotting
It's time to admit that things are looking kind of strange
Now everyone around me is turning into zombies
They're coming at me and I can't explain
I want to love them still
They just want to eat their fill
I'd offer them my heart but all they really want is brains
[Verse 2]
Met up with Barry Friday morning at the water cooler
He told me Fred in accounting got bit and is now a drooler
Even though he's a jerk
I take no enjoyment
Because now he's out a job and zombies can't collect unemployment
But that's why you don't walk alone at night
Pretty soon you won't do anything but groan and bite
It's an epidemic and
Ineptability's your downfall
Gotta be prepared
Or get prepared to be devoured y'all

They come at you with sheer animal force
You better be alert or learn to fear the cannibal corpse
People get careless
They lower their awareness
Now the zombie's looking for a meal and found their main course
I hate to resort to cowardly tactics
But flight before fight
I am a pacifist
Plus I got plans for the night
Give me an opportunity to bolt and I'm gone
I gotta get home to watch a George A. Romero marathon

[Hook]
[Bridge]
This predicament is indicative of us beating our chest
Celebrating starving spirits while we're feeding our flesh
We're not feeding on flesh
But we need to confess
Whether or not we admit it that we're greedy for death
Let's get real for a second
I really must insist
Even though zombies are make believe
The walking dead exist
You can find them everywhere
They're really hard to miss
They've been steadily multiplying since the third of Genesis

[Hook]