Zach Sherwin
Albert Einstein vs Stephen Hawking
[Intro: Announcer (Nice Peter)]
Epic Rap Battles of History
Albert Einstein vs
Stephen Hawking, begin

[Verse 1: Albert Einstein (MC Mr. Napkins)]
When I apply my battle theory, minds are relatively blown
So take a seat Steve, oop, I see you brought your own
What's with your voice? I can't frickin' tell
You sound like WALL-E having sex with a Speak & Spell
I'll school you anywhere, MIT to Oxford
All your fans will be like, "Um, that was Hawk'ward"
I'm as dope as two rappers, you better be scared
'Cause that means Albert E equals MC squared!

[Verse 2: Stephen Hawking (Nice Peter)]
You've got no idea
What you're messin' with here, boy
I've got twelve inch rims on my chair, that's how I roll y'all
You look like someone glued a mustache on a troll doll
I'll be stretchin' out the rhyme like gravity stretches time
When you try to put your little p-brane against this kind of mind
I'm the best, I'm the Snoop Dogg of Science
I'll be dropping mad apples on your head from the shoulders of giants

[Verse 3: Albert Einstein (MC Mr. Napkins)]
I'm the giant whose shoulders you'd have stood on, if you could stand
I'll give you a brief history of pain with the back of my hand
You can't destroy matter or me, for serious
Ripping holes in you bigger than the hole in your black hole theory was!
[Verse 4 Stephen Hawking (Nice Peter)]
There are ten-million-million-million-million-million-million-million-million-million particles in the universe that we can observe
Your mama took the ugly ones and put them into one nerd
You wanna bring the heat with the mushroom clouds you're making
I'm about to bake raps from scratch like Carl Sagan
And while it's true that my work is based on you
I'm a super-computer, you're like a TI-82, ooh

[Outro: Announcer (Nice Peter)]
Who won? Who's next? You decide
Epic... Rap...
Battles of History