My computer broke down today
I'm going to throw my old friend away
Cos the hard disk crashed when the write head parked
In a quite calamitous way

And I won't get the data back
And I haven't backed anything up
I've lost a hundred gigs of memories
This whole thing's so fucked up

All my emails to the girlfriend
Who later disappeared
The videos of sex with her
I still watch to get off
Goodbye my old friend

My Photoshop experiments
With dogs with human heads
My huge harem of pregnant redheads
Lying with open legs
The endless masturbation fodder
The Instant Messenger chats
So goodbye friends

My computer broke down today
It's a personal tragedy
There's nothing much left of a human being
Without his memory
It's like I'll never have a life again
It's like I'll wander on an endless plain
Like my brain and face have been erased
And my life has been in vain

All the books that I was writing
All the albums half-composed
My photographs of holidays
I'll never take again
The cracked software from Piratebay
Before the pigs cracked down

My fuckbuddy list no longer exists
So goodbye friends