William Finn
Days Like This
[WHIZZER, spoken]
Good morning.​

[MARVIN]
Whizzer, kid, you're looking very good today
You had to see yourself a few days back
I had a heart attack!
Jesus
But today you seem to be
On the way to recovery!
Oh, Whizzer, I want to applaud!
It's days like this I almost believe in God
Days like this I almost believe
In God

[Cordelia enters the hopital room with food.]

[CORDELIA, spoken]
Hello!

[WHIZZER, spoken]
Hi! Food...

[CORDELIA]
Rugelach!
Gefilte fish!
It's so good, you'd think it's Italian!
Also a soup made from chicken
That, though un-exotic, is antibiotic!
Oh, I'm up to my ass
In a kosher morass!
For aches and croup
Try my chicken soup!
[MARVIN, CORDELIA]
Whizzer (So, let's begin)
Kid, you're looking (It's medicine!)
Very good today (It could be we're both)
You had to see yourself (Going to cure you)
A few days back (Me with my soup)
I had a heart attack! (She with her medication)
Jesus! (Such elation!)

[MARVIN & CORDELIA]
But today you seem to be
On the way to recovery!
Oh, Whizzer, I want to applaud!
It's days like this we almost believe in God
Days like this we almost believe
In

[CORDELIA]
Gefilte fish!

[MARVIN]
God!

[CORDELIA]
Canadelach!
[Trina and Mendel enter.]

[TRINA, spoken]
Hi!

[WHIZZER, spoken]
Hi.​

[TRINA]
We had trouble parking
Just like on our second date

[MENDEL]
I hyperventilate
But since I'm parking in the city, I've improved
Or else the hydrants moved!

[Cordelia laughs.]

[CORDELIA, spoken]
Nobody? Okay...

[TRINA, spoken]
No, no, no, no, no

[MENDEL, spoken]
Yeah? Okay, alright.​ Mm-hm
(sung)
Go ahead, be good and pissed
"How can I help?'' says the wiry psychiatrist!

[TRINA]
He'll make you well!

[WHIZZER, spoken]
Right.​

[MENDEL]
I'll make you well!

[Charlotte and Jason enter.]

[CHARLOTTE & JASON]
Whizzer, hello!

[JASON]
Gee, you look awful
I think you need to play some chess

[WHIZZER]
Jason, sit down and begin

[JASON]
I'll let you win, Whizzer

[WHIZZER]
Don't let me win

[JASON]
I'll let you win

(MARVIN & CHARLOTTE, CORDELIA, JASON, MENDEL & TRINA)
Whizzer (Rugelach) (I'll make you well)
Kid, you're (Gefilte fish) (Whizzer) (He'll make)
Looking very (Hello) (You well)
Good today (It's so good) (I'll make you well)
You had to (You'd think) (Gee) (He'll make)
See yourself (It's Italian) (You look awful) (you well)
A few days back (Also a soup) (I'll make)
I had a (I think you) (You well)
Heart attack (Made with chicken) (Need to) (He'll make)
Jesus (That though un-exotic) (Play some chess) (You well)
(I'll make you well) (Is antibiotic)

[MARVIN, TRINA, MENDEL, JASON, CHARLOTTE & CORDELIA]
But today you seem to be
On the way to recovery!
Oh, Whizzer, I want to applaud!
It's days like this we almost believe in God
Days like this we almost believe in God
Days like this we almost believe in God
Days like this we almost believe
In

[TRINA, spoken]
What is this?

[CORDELIA]
Gefilt-ee fish!

[MENDEL, spoken]
Gefilt-ah fish?

[MARVIN]
Right!

[TRINA]
He's looking very good today!

[JASON, spoken]
Your turn!

[Whizzer yawns.]

[MARVIN, TRINA, MENDEL, JASON, CHARLOTTE & CORDELIA]
God!