Billy is a new man
He does the best he can
To figure out what it's about
And what the hell he's meant to be
He does the right thing when expected
'Nuff respect
Once in a while he likes a smoke and a joke
Just as long as it's P.C
And he thinks that he cries at the movies
'Cause he's in touch with his feminine side
Sally wants a proud man
Sally wants a proud man
Sally wants a proud man
'Cause she's taken all his pride

Billy is a new man, at least when she's around
A model father or if needed
He'll be mother for the day
He watches "Men Behaving Badly"
Though he'll gladly switch it off
If she's offended
He'll pretend it wasn't funny anyway
He's got one face he keeps for his woman
And one for when he's out with the guys
Sally wants a true man
Sally wants a true man
Sally wants a true man
But he's living out a lie
Better go and find an analyst, or something
Time for sorting out his head
Better go and find the book to read about it
Just like his daddy never did

And he reads Marie Claire at the Doctors
Just in case there is something he should know
Sally wants a free man
Sally wants a free man
Sally wants a free man
But she will not let him go

Billy is confused
He feels abusive and abused
He's got his one hand on an olive branch
The other on his crotch
He drives a sensible coupé
He thinks Oasis are OK
He drinks non-alcoholic lager though
He'd rather have a scotch

And he tries very hard to be happy
But there's a few little things in the way

'Cause Billy wants a good girl
And a bad girl
And a blonde girl
And a brunette
Or a Bond Girl
And a house maid
And a tease maid
And a French maid
Yeah, a sex aid
And a Goddess
And a confidante
A wet nurse and an agony aunt
A lover, mother, baby sitter
A young girl with a pretty face
And smart
But not too smart to love an asshole
Yes, an asshole
Billy wants to be an asshole
Singin'
Billy wants it all now
Billy wants it all now
Billy wants it all now
But he's too ashamed to say

Sally wants a Superman
Sally wants a Superman
Sally wants a Superman
She hasn't got a chance