I was wakened in the mornin'
By a knockin' on the door
So, I got up and went to see
What all the knockin' was for
There stood the Devil
With a box addressed to me
He said "Boy, I've got something here
I think you oughta see

I said, I know that I don't want it
If it's anything from you
'Cause I hate everything you say
And don't like anything you do
But then he pointed with his finger
And he smiled kinda sly
'Cause the package said "from God"
There in the corner, way up high

So I said, "if it's from God
Then why'd He send it here by you"
He said, "He always sends me
When there's dirty work to do"
And this box is full of misery
Poverty and shame
To perfect you through your suffering
Till you're worthy of His name
Well, I'd been pretty patient
But that last line took the cake
I just couldn't take no more
I'd taken all that I could take
So, I told him what I thought of him
And all his filthy lies
And then I fired the shot
That got him right between the eyes

I told him "Jesus took my sickness
And my poverty away
You nailed Him to the cross yourself
When you murdered Him that day
The suffering that I do
Will be for love and not for shame
I'm already worthy
By His blood, to wear His name

And I know my Father loves me
And has only good in store
So, you just take that jive
And get away from my front door
You can write my name on packages
Until I'm ninety-two
But every single one
I'm sending back to Hell with you"
Go on, get out of here!