[Verse 1]
She says he's gone away on a short holiday
He won't be back for awhile
The twelve from the bench stood up
And hesitated he'll be leaving
Right after this trial

[Verse 2]
Circumstance, evidence who can cheat providence
He wished he could go back again
A flick of the wrist
He wished that he had missed
Not guilty is all he can say

[Chorus 1]
Pass 'round the gossip now
Let's wait and see
Pass 'round the tray now
Let's have some tea
My boys haven't seen him
He's been working away
Don't bother looking
He's not home today
Not home today

[Verse 3]
T-shirts and badges
With free tickles and smudges
In the end you'll believe what you feel
When ten hands are aiming
And no-one is complaining
In a sense it could be more real
[Chorus 2]
Pass 'round the gossip now
Let's wait and see
Pass 'round the tray now
Let's have some tea
My boys haven't seen him
He's been working away
Don't bother asking
He's not home today
Not home today