[Spoken]
What is going on? Uh, what is going on? Uh, what is going on?

I don't wanna be a granola-head!

Eating magic mushrooms ain't for me
Or getting all screwed up on LSD
Or eating bean sprouts all day long
And smoking pot out of a bong
Wearing flowers in my hair
And having dirty underwear

I don't wanna be a granola-head
I don't wanna be a granola-head

Whacked-out hippies' brains are scrambled eggs
Ugly chicks with very hairy legs
I think I'd rather be at home
Listening to the Ramones
Or hanging out and gettin' drunk
With a buncha useless punks

I don't wanna be a granola-head
I don't wanna be a granola-head

Oh, can't you see?
It's not for me
Eating bean sprouts all day long
And smoking pot out of a bong
Wearing flowers in my hair
And having dirty underwear
I don't wanna be a granola-head
I don't wanna be a granola-head
I don't wanna be a granola-head
I don't wanna be a granola-head