[Intro]
As seen on TV
As seen on TV

[Verse 1]
High-powered, chrome-plated American dream
Multi-speed, turbo-charged, high capacity
Ergonomic, economic, realistic feel
Jumbo-sized, made with high-carbon steel

[Refrain]
As seen on TV
As seen on TV

[Verse 2]
Comes in spring colors, this is something you need
Buy two this week, and we throw one in for free
Rust resistant, shatterproof, one day only deal
Customized, proven to boost sex appeal

[Refrain]
As seen on TV
As seen on TV

[Verse 1]
High-powered, chrome-plated American dream
Multi-speed, turbo-charged, high capacity
Ergonomic, economic, realistic feel
Jumbo-sized, made with high-carbon steel
[Refrain]
As seen on TV
As seen on TV

[Verse 2]
Comes in spring colors, this is something you need
Buy two this week, and we throw one in for free
Rust resistant, shatterproof, one day only deal
Customized, proven to boost sex appeal

[Outro]
As seen on TV