Mark Kozelek
Song of Shadows
Reading John Connolly's novel 'A Song Of Shadows'
Was looking out my bay window at the stunning Golden Gate Bridge
It's May 12th, 7 p.m. at night
And I'm sitting here waiting for you and I don't like it that we've been in a fight

I leave at the end of next week to start a tour in Paris
And like always the night before I'm going to take you out to Harris'
Our favorite dinner spot in the world down on Van Ness
Me and my girl, my everything, my beautiful princess

I'm a handful anyone would agree that's true
And when I die someday everybody who knew me will have a good story or two
But one thing nobody ever really knew
Is just how much you mean to me and how deeply I loved you

Without you my life would cave in
I'd be an empty old man curled up in a bed laying there aging
I'd have a girl who'd be sitting here next to me staring at her phone
Shooting stupid photos of her stupid face out into this stupid world
Without you my life would be a ship wreck
I'd be going down to the bank depositing my royalty checks
Flirting with the bank tellers behind the desk
And when I'd walk out the door they'd all have a good laugh at my expense

I remember my 43rd birthday you took me for steak and lobster at Poor Red's
We came back and got in my hot tub up in the mountains
There was a chill in the air and light snow on the ground
It was the best birthday I ever had and I was so proud to have you in my life and I'd just bought the house
Now it's May 16th and I'm on your couch sitting by the fireplace
You're making chili in the kitchen and it smells so good and we've patched things up and now I'm feeling OK
And I'm intrigued with this character a young girl named Amanda the daughter of Ruth Winter in the book 'A
Song of Shadows'

She's got a thing for older men no time for boys her own age
And it's time to eat now so I closed the book on an airplane ticket between the 67th and 68th page
And it's Saturday, 9 p.m. at night
And in this moment I love you so much and everything about my life

Without you I'd not have much to live for
When I come home from these long trips and set my shit down on the floor
I'd have a number from some girl from Singapore or Shanghai
And when I'd call her she'd ask if I had Twitter or Skype and I'd lay down on my bed and I'd wanna fucking die
Without you my life would be a nightmare
I'd hibernate all through the winter like a big old Alaskan brown bear
And I'd spend my Christmases & my birthdays all alone and way down there in the stack of books would be
'A Song Of Shadows'