It's Wedding Day in Funeralville
Your soup spoon's on your right
The King and Queen will alternate
With the refrigerator light

They'll be boxing on the T.V. show
The colored kids will sing
Hooray for you, the midnight's oil
Lets burn the whole damn thing

Felicia is my dark horse girl
I'll take her if it rains
She throws a punch upon the host
And says many stupid things

But she ain't so bad when we're all alone
She's as different as can be
She's a part of my heart
Don'tcha pull us apart
She's like one of the family

Oh, no, trouble in the attic
Won't somebody turn on a light?
Got so, so many troubles
Can't even tell wrong from right
I'm gonna comb my hair
Darn my socks, tip my hat
And say goodnight

It's a wedding day in Funeralville
What shall I wear tonight?

My car is stuck in Washington
And I cannot find out why
Come sit beside me on the swing
And watch the angels cry

It's anybody's ball game
It's everybody's fight
And the street lamp said
As he nodded his head
It's lonesome out tonight

Oh, no, trouble in the attic
Won't somebody turn on a light?
Got so, so many troubles
Can't even tell wrong from right

I'm gonna comb my hair
Darn my socks, tip my hat
And say goodnight
It's a wedding day in Funeralville
What shall I wear tonight?
It's a wedding day in Funeralville
What shall I wear tonight?