i laugh easily

i wish i didn’t.

It comes from

teetering on the edge
of someone else’s desires

It comes from

Complying

not wanting to cause discomfort to others

Fuck others.

Why do i have to bear
the weight of the discomfort?

Let’s sit in this crevice of awkward silence together.

So you can absorb how you

stained my soul
crushed my spirit

and ability to form sentences.

i wish i talked slower.

let the words linger

and be born
in full form

but instead they skitter

like butterflies

in a storm.

i stutter when i’m tired.

How to speak surely, though?

when i’m not sure
if you are listening