Stephen Sondheim
Pretty Women (Pt. 1)
[TODD, spoken]
And what may I do for you, sir? A stylish trimming of the hair? A soothing skin massage?

[JUDGE TURPIN]
You see, sir, a man infatuate with love
Her ardent and eager slave
So fetch the pomade and pumice stone
And lend me a more seductive tone
A sprinkling, perhaps, of French cologne
But first, sir, I think, a shave

[TODD]
The closest I ever gave

[TODD whistles cheerfully.]

[JUDGE TURPIN, spoken]
Well, you're in a merry mood today, Mr. Todd. 

[TODD]
'Tis your delight, sir, catching fire
From one man to the next

[JUDGE TURPIN]
'Tis true, sir, love can still inspire
The blood to pound, the heart leap higher
What more
[TODD]
What more

[JUDGE TURPIN & TODD]
Can man require—

[JUDGE TURPIN]
Than love, sir?

[TODD]
More than love, sir

[JUDGE TURPIN]
What, sir?

[TODD]
Women

[JUDGE TURPIN]
Ah yes, women

[TODD]
Pretty women

[TODD lathers the JUDGE's face, then turns to his razor.]