Stephen Sondheim
Poor Baby
[SARAH]
Darling—

[HARRY]
Yes?

[SARAH]
Robert—

[HARRY]
What?

[SARAH]
I worry—

[HARRY]
Why?

[SARAH]
He's all alone

[HARRY]
Hmm

[SARAH]
There's no one—
[HARRY]
Where?

[SARAH]
In his life

[HARRY]
Oh

[SARAH]
Robert ought to have a woman

Poor baby, all alone
Evening after evening by the telephone—
We're the only tenderness he's ever known
Poor baby...

[JENNY]
David—

[DAVID]
Yes?

[JENNY]
Bobby—
[DAVID]
What?

[JENNY]
I worry—

[DAVID]
Why?

[JENNY]
It's such a waste

[DAVID]
Hmm

[JENNY]
There's no one—

[DAVID]
Where?

[JENNY]
In his life

[DAVID]
Oh
[JENNY]
Bobby ought to have a woman

Poor baby, sitting there
Staring at the walls and playing solitairе
Making conversation with the empty air—
Poor baby...

[SARAH]
Robеrt...

[JENNY]
Bobby...

[SARAH]
Robert, angel...

[JENNY]
Bobby, honey...

[SARAH]
You know, no one
Wants you to be happy
More than I do
No one, but
Isn't she a little bit, well
You know...?

(the following lines overlap)

[JENNY]
You know
No one wants you to be happy more
Than I do
No one, but

[SARAH]
Face it
Why her?
Better
No one...

[SARAH & JENNY]
Isn't she a little bit, well
You know...?
Face it

(the following lines overlap)

[SARAH]
Why these meaningless relationships?
They can't make you happy
But you know better...

[JENNY]
Why her?
Better, no one...
Isn't she a little bit, well
You know better

[SUSAN]
You know, no one
Wants you to be happy
More than I do
No one, but
Isn't she a little bit, well
You know...?
Face it

[AMY & JOANNE]
You know, no one
Wants you to be happy
More than I do
No one, but--

[WIVES, together]
Isn't she a little bit, well...

[SARAH]
Dumb?

[AMY]
Tacky?

[SUSAN]
Vulgar?

[JENNY]
Old?

[JOANNE]
Tall?

[SUSAN]
Aggressive?

[AMY]
Neurotic?

(the following lines overlap)

[SARAH]
Where is she from?
She's very weird...

[JENNY]
And cheap
And gross
And...

[SUSAN]
Peculiar?
Depressing
And...

[AMY]
She seems so dead
And immature...

[JOANNE]
She's tall enough to be your mother...
Goliath!...

[WIVES, together]
Poor baby, all alone
Throw a lonely dog a bone
It's still a bone
We're the only tenderness
He's ever known
Poor baby