Dizaster
Dizaster vs Jerzy Swift
[Round 1: Dizaster]
So there's a part where you said something about battling a dragon
And then you told me, "Take that as a threat"
So I can do is combine 'em both and all I can think about is your breath
Listen faggot, you gotta be joking
I mean Lush, what the fuck are you smoking?
This motherfucker done brought me to the same room that I choked in
But right now the curse is broken
I wave the electromagnetic pulse then I'm burst you open
I'm the bad man from the west coast, I'm west coasting
If you disagree catch a backhand like the US Open
You have the skin pigmentation of Greg Oden
But you are as intimidating as Seth Rogan
Let him joke, don't wave your hands let him choke, I'm never joking
Bitch I'd even wrestle Hogan
I'll grab Jerzy Swift by his neck and choke him like an episode of Greco Roman
He wants to be a gangsta then the Tec exploding
You will find him in his sweater soaking H.E.M.O. globin
See what's sad about you is you can't see how much you suck
You're so wack after your last round, even the crickets were in the background like, "What the FUCK?"
You're wack as fuck you could never do bodily harm
You look like a slut when you're crossing your arms
See me I freestyle cause I can do it better
And that just happened ironically rhyme with "stupid sweater"
I'm 'bout to get up on some random shit
When lights flash I become Gambit quick
You better be mad equipped before you get manhandled with
This ax to your abdomen that will shatter your back and hips
And put you in a bag faster than Charles Manson's bitch
Homie you could never match the prince
But a new dawn has to begin
I'll hit you with this hand crafted ass whipping that I've mastered within
And smack you so fast in your chin
You accidentally do a Tiger Swipe and automatically spin
And your back will fall apart faster than a wall when it collapsed in Berlin
You could never battle Dizaster and win
But if you do, your chances are slim
That's like crashing on the Titanic only to beat out one guy that crossed the Atlantic and swims
You I don't know- I mean I don't know
You walk with a legend
You're a novice, my progress is a lot better
You don't palm shit, no science forensics, you're not Dexter
Stop guessing this mark's gender
You're not fresh you're a cross dresser
I bet you got a gay alarm sensor on your top dresser
That goes off whenever you put on your mom's sweatshirt
He went to jail, became a cock fetcher
Now he got AIDS buried deep inside him like the lost treasure
Every time you get locked up they should hang a sign up above your ass that says "Beware of the dogs, do not enter."
You think I'm scared of you and your squad member?
You faggots hang out performance and arts center
I'll surround you with more shots than a bartender
Then I'll put your father in an arm bar like Brock Lesnar
You're a shopping ball cart vendor
See people refer to you as Jerzey Swift, but to me you just the homie Big Hurt 'Em's bitch
Oh yeah, shut you're a pirate and a butt piper
Relax and have a Budweiser
How is he a thug rhymer when last he was seen in that one cipher sporting skinny jeans and a sun visor
You have a fetish for peeing and you even fuck minors
I bet your ultimate dream is to do a scene on muff divers
Eating out a bitch that looks like Eve from Ruff Ryders
And since he's from Jersey like that faggot Arsonal
He's a bus driver
[Round 2: Dizaster]
It ain't a thing for me to fucking break you
The last ten minutes what have you accomplished
Besides making everybody in this fucking crowd hate you?
You keep talking shit about my girl but you barely rhyme
You just mad cause you thought your chick was very fine
But she looks like shit compared to mine
You look like you fucked up off of seven Ecstasy pills
You fit the description of a fucking rapper that can't wait to sign his record deal
So he can cop a Bentley and chill
You are the fucking epitome of a faggot rapper who buys a mansion in Beverly Hills
And next month ends up broke as fuck cause he can't pay his energy bill
Let me kick you down with a little game
Who the fucks your favorite rapper? Lil' Wayne?
Listen, sacrificing your image is never worth it at the expense of a little fame
Which brings us to today?
No one knows what your name is but we all wanna see you stop breathing
Cause you stupid enough to want to become famous for all the wrong reasons
I mean, what you think was gonna happen after this battle you fucking fag
You gonna get a 100,000 views and proceed to become the battle rapping's scene punching bag
I bet your father looks like a Somalian Rob Reiner
That motherfucker has arthritis and he got Alzheimers
Your mom has a pair of long side burns that remind me of the stripes on a Dodge Viper
You think you're gangster?
I'll ambush your block with a flock of armed snipers
Throwing bullets at your noggin the size of car lighters
You're not a battle rapper you're a faggot ass song writer
And even at that, you're a part timer
Your hobbies are roller blading, you're a rock climber
You cannot fucking rap with me
I'm a top rhymer
I already told you last time, I'll scar you up
You little fucking faggot, let's start talking rap
And talking 'bout how if you talk over me I'm gonna sock this cat
If you dare set foot
[Jerzey Swift]
You're lying

[Dizaster]
Shut up bitch! If you dare set foot next to my f-
Listen you fucking fuck, don't you talk over me
And don't fucking do this to me
You better thank me for giving you this opportunity
So at the end, before you talk over me
There's something you should know, don't temp me
Have some fucking respect motherfucker yeah, respect me
Cause I told you your bars are wack
No one gives a fuck how much you charge for tracks
Your mom looks like the Martian from Mars Attacks
If you dare set foot next to my father's falafel shack
I'll launch a rocket at your apartment flat and leave your whole fucking apartment flat
I'll show up to one of your faggot ass after parties in a hockey mask and let the shotty blast
Put every single member of your bitch ass posse inside a body cast
And walk up and sign 'em an autograph
If you lying and you deny it then someone needs to supply you a polygraph
You looking hella outta place like Mark McGrath
If he ever stepped into a cipher wearing a stocking cap
Motherfucker you so awkward that I forgot that you're black
And thought of that Stockton cat
Battling me is like trying to teach Mr. Miyagi a karate class
Or challenging Rocky to a boxing match
Guarantee that your arm will snap
Catch him on the freeway, sock you across the dash causing your car to crash
By the time you get to the hospital where the doctor's at
They'll be pulling shards of glass apart from your Starter's cap
Go ahead faggot, respond to that
This muhfucker wanna argue back
You're just bothered that I couldn't get your father back his job at OfficeMax
Give it up for Jerz, he knows where all the hot Spanish mami's at
Except the only problem is that, they're all probably fat
And they got Army tats
Fuck you, your mom, your dad, your dog, your cat
Whoever taught you to rap
You even get your barber clapped
You're looking hella outta place like you forgot your map
You're looking hella lost in fact you probably need an Almanac
You're not sick you're a hypochondriac with a body rash
And you probably got a doctor's pass
You never been a rider on the block selling blocks of hash
The only four quarters that you probably have are for your laundry mat
Go kill yourself faggot
[Round 3: Dizaster]
And now Saddam comes from his cave
And shows him how fucking the definition of being brave
I mean if this muhfucker gave me a chance, I'll probably cream on his wife
You probably got the funniest looking ears I ever seen in my life
You're wack as fuck
You're older than a fucking dinosaur
You are so wack you make me not even wanna rhyme no more
I mean, why would you tempt me?
When I'm spitting I'm risky
An Egyptian guide gypsy after 5950
Spitting rhymes like I was addicted to sniffing lines swiftly
Unbelievable like my vision was depicted by Ripleys
[?] with your time shifting sending shivers in your spine like you were in the sky drifting
This suspicious guy's tripping
You think you earn a decent living cause you work a 6:00-5:00 chicken thigh flipping
I'd rather kill a guy than live my life simping
Get caught by the pigs tonight that's wishful type thinking
If you think that I would ever live inside prison
Then get the nine hit him then I'll dip to a crib I've hidden
You ain't got shit on my rhythm
I'll follow Nike's request and Just Do It
Sever your head and turn your legs into fluid
Dump lead in your Buick without putting any effort into it
And have your skeleton removed before you can get rescued by the medical unit
You're wack as fuck and you an amateur
Don't be mad at me you're wack and start flipping off the camera
You're weak as fuck, just like you're fucking [?]
Off the top of the dome motherfucker, you will get messed up
I already told you last time, you keep talking about last week
You're mad I voted against you that's fucking why
You wanna know why I voted for the other guy?
Cause you were softer than a butterfly
I mean this motherfucker can't even kick a free
This stupid idiot came here rapped about Vision more than he rapped about me
Listen, I'm Dizaster, the dude with a bunch of clever disses plus a Beretta that never misses
Effortlessly I sever heads in less than several minutes
You will never find a better lyricist
I'm on a different level of physics
You follow the curriculum while I'm bending the limits
I'll jaw check you and send you to the medical dentist
And have your grill looking like it was infected with Syphilis
Better get my doe right
Cut that check with eleven digits before I push that Snow White like seven midgets
I can beat you at your own game
Guns or drugs you never see me fail
I'm a born hustler give it to you in detail
Move ecstasy in envelops that's what I call e-mail
This motherfucker is wack why am I even battling him for?
This shit has been over since the first line I don't even gotta rap anymore
It's over, I'm done, you're wack as fuck and you're nameless
So thank me at the end cause I just made you famous