[Chorus]
This is hell, this is hell
I am sorry to tell you
It never gets better or worse
But you'll get used to it after a spell
For heaven is hell in reverse

[Verse 1]
The bruiser spun a hula hoop, all the barmen preen and pout
The neon "i" of "nightclub" flickers on and off and finally blew out
The irritating jingle of the belly-dancing, phony Turkish girls
The eerie glare of ultraviolet perfect dental work

[Chorus]
This is hell
I am sorry to tell you
It never gets better or worse
(It never gets better or worse)
But you'll get used to it after a spell
For heaven is hell in reverse

[Verse 2]
The failed Don Juan in the big bow tie is very sorry that he spoke
For he's mislaid his punchline more than halfway through a very tasteless joke
The fraulein caught him peeking down her gown, he's yelling in her ear
And all at once the music stopped as he was intimately bellowing, "My dear..."
[Chorus]
This is hell, this is hell
I am sorry to tell you
It never gets better or worse
(It never gets better or worse)
But you'll get used to it after a spell
For heaven is hell in reverse

[Bridge]
The shirt you wore with courage
And the violent nylon suit
Reappear upon your back
And undermine the polished line you try to shoot
It's not the torment of the flames
That finally sees your flesh corrupted
It's the small humiliations that your memory piles up
(This is hell) This is hell
(This is hell) This is hell

[Verse 3]
"My Favorite Things" are playing again and again
But it's by Julie Andrews and not by John Coltrane
Endless balmy breezes and perfect sunsets framed
Vintage wine for breakfast and naked starlets floating in champagne
All the passions of your youth are tranquillised and tamed
You may think it looks familiar, though you may know it by another name
[Chorus]
This is hell (This is hell)
This is hell (This is hell)
I am sorry to tell you
It never gets better or worse
(It never gets better or worse)
But you'll get used to it after a spell
For heaven is hell in reverse
This is hell, this is hell