Newton Faulkner
First World Problems
[Verse 1: Mikill Pane]
Oh brother, my life's full of drama
I'm tryna stay calm, in spite of all the karma
Justice can't see, I reckon she needs some glasses
She just punishes me, instead of the evil cunts
This is the type of blues that men can only get in the first world
I'm kind of used to ending up in bed with the worst girls
I wouldn't suggest that every chick has made my life terrible
But all the best were definitely raging bisexuals
I can't explain the feeling of believing that she'd need this
When the cunt that pain competes with doesn't even have a penis
If we could try a threesome, it would seem to ease the hardest part
There is no I in team but there is me in a menage-à-trois
I'm pretty sure I'll never use that clever line again
Because the women that they dump me for never like men
Whatever I did to earn such luck
Made my sex life shit as 2 Girls 2 Cup

[Hook: Newton Faulkner]
I've got so much to lose
Oh, I've got so far to fall
Too many choices to make
And making choices takes it toll
I've got troubles to fake
Got no real troubles at all
Nobody wants to relate
Keep faking problems till the dawn
[Verse 2: Mikill Pane]
I've got too many problems in my pitiful life
I probably never solve em dissing women all night
I should start by telling Nike I plan to send shoes back
Cause there's no space in my 2-bedroom flat
Life is all a drag, all the selecting made me mental
Do I light a normal fag or do I press to make it menthol?
I can't recall the countries that I've been to, after all
I've traveled more than somebody that cheats at basketball
I signed a label deal, but I'm lazy so I'm wishing
That they'd stop letting me be myself and make my own decisions
For instance, I'm back to self-release an EP now
But I couldn't think of a name that you could easily pronounce
M-I-K-I-L-L's Mic-ill
Say my name right, I'm stressing, I might kill
I bet you still think it's Mick-ill, but I've enlightened you so much
I'm paying bigger electricity bills

[Hook: Newton Faulkner]

[Bridge: Newton Faulkner & Mikill Pane]
I've taken all that I can take
And now it's cluttering my hole
I used to wait for private days
Now I'm not bothering at all
And I've seen the error of my ways
I've seen much worse on Channel 4
And Lady Luck left me amazed
Read me a curse, then slammed the door
[Hook: Newton Faulkner x2]