When our old age pension check comes to our door
We won't have to dread the poor house anymore
Though we're old and thin and gray
Good times will be back to stay
When our old age pension check comes to our door
When her old age pension check comes to her door

Dear old grandma won't be lonesome any more
She'll be waiting at the gate
Every night she'll have a date
When her old age pension check comes to her door

Grow a flowing long white beard and use a cane
'Cause you're in your second childhood, don't complain
Life will just begin at sixty
We'll all feel very frisky
When our old age pension check comes to our door

Powder and paint will be abolished on that day
And hoop skirts will then be brought back into play
Painted cheeks will be the rage
And old maids will tell their age
When their old age pension check comes to their door

All the drug stores will go bankrupt on that day
For cosmetics, they will all be put away
I'll put a flapper on the shelf
Get a grandma for myself
When her old age pension check comes to her door
There's a man that turned this country upside-down
With his old age pension rumor going 'round
If you want in on the fun
Send your dime to Washington
And that old age pension man will be around