[Verse 1: Bart Baker as Taylor Swift & Nash Grier]
What's up, people? Satan's back
By now everybody knows that's me
And I've got a new hot man
Saw his Vines and I thought
Oh my God, look at his face!
Who cares if he's underage?
Time to ruin your life babe
Wait, what?
Nothing! Haha!
I'm not on Spotify
To hear my album you'll have to pay
It costs $13.99
Sold a million in a few days
My God, I'm so rich
Some people say I'm a greedy bitch
Now I am painting his portrait
Can I please get up?
Move and I'll slit your wrists!

[Chorus: Taylor Swift]
I am the dark lord of evil
One day soon I will rule the earth
But I got this cute new boyfriend
And I gotta torture his ass first
This is how I always do it
I cast a sweet love spell
And once they're in my web I become
The girlfriend from Hell!
[Verse 2: Taylor Swift & Nash Grier]
There's a mean YouTube guy
Who does song parodies about me
I would like to see him die
Is Bart Baker the one you mean?
That's right! Bart Baker!
I'll crush him! That hater!
Then why did you copy him?
Say what?
Have you read the comments on YouTube
About this video?
Fans say you stole his plot by acting nuts and psycho
I've always been this way!
You are totally insane
What's wrong, sweetheart? You look scared
Oh my God, you're the Devil!
Your worst fucking nightmare!

[Chorus: Taylor Swift & Nash Grier]
My boyfriend found out I'm Satan
It happens every single time
There's no chance of him escaping
So don't you even try!
Now I'm gonna stab his painting
And cuts holes in his clothes
Next step is to kill you, baby!
Dating Satan blows!
[Verse 3: Taylor Swift, Henri Wittelsohn as Pope Francis, Bart Baker as Lorde]
It's time for you to be tortured
Then you'll be sacrificed
Who are you?
Pope Francis
And by the power of Christ
I cast you out unclean spirit
Leave her forevermore
I command you to be gone in
The name of the Lord!
Did somebody call me?
I think I heard my name
I was next door recording
A new song for Hunger Games
We're performing an exorcism!
Your mom sucks cocks in Hell!
The power of Christ compels you
Demon, be expelled!

[Outro Skit: Pope Francis]
It's finally over
The world can live in peace once again
Let's get you out of here, young man