Hotel Books
Van Nuys
[Verse 1]
Every church has a steeple
And their own form of suicide
And I’d like to think if I lived through the Bible
Soon after, I would have probably died
But I have no weapons, just a lot of ammunition
And the muddy waters I’m stepping in
Until you showed me my own wisdom
I promised myself I’d never neglect another gray sky
Take another trip to Van Nuys and stop at Best Buy
To see if the record I wrote has sold enough
For me to just fade out and let time pass by

[Chorus]
And I don’t know where I stand
So I guess I’ll just fall apart
Because I know that there’s blood on my hands
If there’s still hate in my heart
And I don’t know where I stand
So I guess I’ll just fall apart
Because I know there’s blood on my hands
If there’s still hate in my heart

[Verse 2]
I booked a flight back to Los Angeles
I’ll be back in the valley, I hope you can handle it
Because nothing says "I love you" quite like your iron fist
And I’m fine with it, as long as you’re happy
And I guess there’s a reason the artist is rarely in the painting
A self-portrait is too personal to create for sustaining
So where is God in this creation, other than our clouds?
This mystery we pray to, hoping it will water our grounds
[Chorus]
And I don’t know where I stand
So I guess I’ll just fall apart
And I know that there’s blood on my hands
If there’s still hate in my heart
And I don’t know where I stand
So I guess I’ll just fall apart
'Cause I know that there’s still blood on my hands
If there’s hate in my heart

[Bridge]
Let this song be a memorial, to when I knew who I was
I’m picturing out my burial, but my heart is afraid of love
Let this song be a memorial, to when I knew who I was
I’m picturing out my burial, but my heart is afraid of love
I’m afraid of love

[Voice Message]
"H-hello?"
"Hey, uhm, I just, I don't think I can do this anymore."

[Bridge]
Let this song be a memorial, to when I knew who I was
I’m picturing out my burial, but my heart is afraid of love
I’m afraid of love
[Voice Message]
"You're so busy all the time, and I haven't seen you in months."