Dan Bull
Election Debate Rap Battle
[Intro]
In a bid to appeal to the younger electorates
The leaders of the three main parties have agreed to a fourth televised debate
In the form of a rap battle
Gentlemen, introduce yourselves

[Verse]
Brown: Gordon Brown, Labour Prime Minister
My style's like my temper, quite sinister
Cameron: I represent the Tories, my name's David Cameron
The chap with more flash than a cameraman
Clegg: I'm Nick Clegg, the head of the Lib Dems
My timing on the mic is precise as Big Ben
Brown: Labour's done amazing things over the past ten years
Cameron: Two wars, a recession, and cash for peers
Like I said, too many twits make a twat
And too many years in power make that
Brown: Vote for Labour
Cameron: No, vote Tory
Brown: Labour
Cameron: Tory
Clegg: Hello! Don't ignore me!
While these two are stuck in an argument
I'm the one with real power in a hung Parliament
To vote Lib Dems is to vote for change
Cameron: Uh, no, it's to throw your vote away
Clegg: We're not like the other two, we don't pretend to be
Brown: We know, you haven't even governed for a century
Clegg: There's no confidence in the encumbrance and Cameron's incompetent
Cameron: Well, you're a (bleep), Nick
The Tory party's all about family
That's why I like to drag mine out to stand with me
Brown: Well, I'll never use my kids as props
That is until my approval rating drops
Clegg: Talking about my private life's forbidden
Although I have slept with thirty women
Brown: Personally, I don't like women, they're bigoted
Clegg: Uh, Gordon, your mic's still transmitting
Brown: Flipping heck, I offer my sincerest apologies
Cameron: That gaff was a bigger cock-up than your policies
Brown: How can you talk about democracy
With that spoon stuck in your mouth by the aristocracy?
Cameron: I don't approve of this
Brown: Then get on your bike
Clegg: Can I sit in the car following behind?
Brown: No, you're a third wheel
Cameron: Unstabilised
Clegg: Whoever wins, I'm being taken for a ride
Brown: Right, there's only one fair way we can decide
Come on, posh boy, step outside