[Verse 1: Boyinaband]
Hello Slender, he-hello Slender (What?)
I just wanna be your friend, I don't intend to offend
I don't want all the pages (Nuh-uh)
I'd rather chill in the woods together and talk for ages (Yeah!)
People say you're bad, but I know the truth
You're so nice I brought a present: a new tie for your suit
So don't gli-i-i-itch and abduct me, I'm friendly
Ah! Oh my God! I'll go be friends with someone else, jeez!

[Verse 2: TheRPGMinx]
Hello Mr., he-hello Mr. Face (Hi!)
I just wanna be your bestest mate
You're just a grunt to most but I think you're great
So let's hang out and have a picnic! (Yay!)
I won't forget your birthday, I don't have amnesia
You got a big mouth but we still share secrets
What's that? (Huh?) Y-you wanna play tag?
Ah! Okay, I'll find another monster to ask!

[Chorus: Boyinaband & TheRPGMinx]
Hello Monsta, he-hello Monsta
I just wanna be your friend
No one wants to get hurt today (Uh-huh)
No one wants to get hurt today (I just wanna be your friend)
Hello Monsta, he-hello Monsta
I just wanna be your friend (Yeah!)
No one wants to get hurt today (Ah, uh-huh)
No one wants to get hurt today
[Verse 3: TheRPGMinx]
Hello Necro⁠—, he-hello Necromorph (Yo!)
You wanna be my BFF? (Of course!)
If you're ever feeling down, buddy, you can embrace me
Play video games at my place, it's Dead Spacey (Ah-ha-ha!)
I want an Alien buddy so I can look at the stars
And hear you gargle out the names so I can point to where they are
Hey, you're smiling at me! I can see your teeth!
Oh! Oh my God! Okay, I'll leave you in peace!

[Verse 4: Boyinaband]
Hello Pyramid, he-hello Pyramid Head
I betcha been acting out because you need a friend (Me!)
I can tell you lift bro, we'll visit the gym
And then find a traffic cone and we'll pretend we're twins (Ha!)
Let's take a trip to Egypt (Whee!)
You'll be so popular, everyone will want to take pics
I hope customs ain't strict with the metal detector
Oh my God! Okay, I'll ask Slender again!

[Verse 5: Markiplier]
I want Slenderman to be my friender-man
And we can take a road trip in the slender-van
With the face and the morph there kicking it too!
And Pyramid Head just picking the tunes! (Oh!)
I want Slenderman to be my friender-man
And we can take a road trip in the slender-van
With the face and the morph there kicking it too!
And Pyramid Head just picking the tunes!
[Chorus: Boyinaband & TheRPGMinx]
Hello Monsta, he-hello Monsta
I just wanna be your friend
No one wants to get hurt today (I just wanna be your friend!)
No one wants to get hurt today (I just wanna be your friend!)
Hello Monsta, he-hello Monsta (Hi!)
I just wanna be your friend
No one wants to get hurt today (Ah, not me!)
No one wants to get hurt today (Nuh-uh, [?])