Heidi Blickenstaff
I Am Playing Me
[HEIDI]
I’m standing here
Just left of center and
Something ain’t clear
When did I sign
On the line
Of this decree

[JEFF]
-cree

[HEIDI]
-cree
(spoken)
Sorry
(sung)
Stuck in a show where I am playing me
(spoken)
That’s funny

[JEFF, spoken]
Keep going

[HEIDI]
I’m trapped in a hole
Nowhere to go with my role
Strain in my neck
For an exit that
Sets me free
[JEFF]
Free

[HEIDI]
Free-ee
Stuck in a show where I am playing me

[JEFF, spoken]
Let’s hear the bridge

[HEIDI, in the background]
I insist I could make a misty
Hiding inside miss Ana Christi
And lord knows I could raise the roof
Playing the maid that goofs in Tartouf
And I could be awesome playing a dude
In the title role of the Mystery of Edwin Drood
Ooooo
Ooooo
Ooooo
Ooooo

[SUSAN, spoken]
How’s the writing?

[HUNTER, spoken]
It’s going, I’m getting nervous that our play is a little "doughnuts for dinner"
[SUSAN, spoken]
Is that a show?

[HUNTER, spoken]
No, "doughnuts for dinner" - you know
It sounds like a good idea but thirty minutes later you’re hungry for something a little meatier

[SUSAN, spoken]
A little meatier? Like, a tiny asteroid is a little meatier?

[HUNTER, spoken]
Exactly; no. I mean I don’t want this to be just sketches and novelty songs linked together
I want there to be substance, not just fluff
Not that there’s anything wrong with fluff
But I wanna strive for something that makes people really pay attention
You know what I mean?

[SUSAN, spoken]
Uhh, I totally stopped listening

[HEIDI]
Not a chance for my career to advance
And there’s no straight guys here for me to romance
I guess I’ll swallow my pride
And make the best of
The rest of this spree
[JEFF]
Spree-

[HEIDI]
That is the note I’m singing, Jeff!
Stuck in a show where I
Am playing
Me