[CUNEGONDE, spoken]
Hot, isn't it?
[GOVERNOR, spoken]
No.
[CUNEGONDE, spoken]
It was cold yesterday, wasn’t it?
[GOVERNOR, spoken]
No.
[CUNEGONDE, spoken]
It'll rain tonight, won't it?
[GOVERNOR, spoken]
Wherever you are, it’s raining all the time.
[OLD LADY, spoken]
Hoy-oy-oy-oy-oy!
[GOVERNOR, spoken]
What's the matter, lady?
[OLD LADY, spoken]
I'm homesick.
[GOVERNOR, spoken]
For where?
[OLD LADY, spoken]
For everywhere but here.
[CUNEGONDE, spoken]
I've tried so hard to remember. Do I move toward you or away from you?
[GOVERNOR, spoken]
Away from me if possible.
[OLD LADY]
No doubt you'll think I'm giving in
To petulance and malice
But in candor I am forced to say
That I'm sick of gracious living in
This stuffy little palace
And I wish that I could leave today
I have suffered a lot
And I'm certainly not
Unaware that this life has its black side
I havе starved in a ditch
I’ve been burned for a witch
And I’m missing thе half of my backside
I've been beaten and whipped
And repeatedly stripped
I’ve been forced into all kinds of whoredom
But I'm finding of late
That the very worst fate
Is to perish of comfort and boredom
[GOVERNOR. spoken]
Quiet.
[CUNEGONDE]
It was three years ago
As you very well know
That you said we would soon have a wedding
Every day you forget
What you promised, and yet
You continue to rumple my bedding
I'll no longer bring shame
On my family name
I would rather lie down and be buried
No, I'll not lead the life
Of an unwedded wife
Tell me, when are we going to be married?
[GOVERNOR, spoken]
Quiet.
[OLD LADY]
I was once, what is more
Nearly sawed in four
By a specially clumsy magician
And you’d think I would feel
After such an ordeal
That there's charm in my present position
But I'd far rather be
In a tempest at sea
Or a bloody North African riot
Than to sit in this dump
On what's left of my rump
And put up with this terrible quiet
[CUNEGONDE]
When are we going to be married?
[OLD LADY]
Comfort and boredom and quiet
[CUNEGONDE]
When are we going to be—
[GOVERNOR]
Quiet!
