[Verse: Danny Sexbang, Jim Roach]
This opening is unneccessary

You're probably thinking to yourself
"Ninja Sex Party, you're awesome!"
We know
But thank you anyway

You're having trouble deciding
Which one of us to have sex with
That's natural
Still nice of you to say

Well, maybe I can help you out
Clear up all of your confusing doubts
Do you want sex with a ninja
Or sex with a guy like me?

The choice should be so obvious (Dan)
And although, he is mysterious (Brian)
Don't you want a man
Who's tall, who's name is Dan
And is Jewish?

One other thing
Everyone in the band has an STD
Except for me
By the process of elimination
You can makе determinations
On who just that might be
It's Brian
Brian has an STD-
Oh shit, I-