[Intro]
It's my money, gonna spend it on gum
It's my career, I can do a shark jump
It's my jaw and I can wire it shut
I can read Goosebumps
They're my favorite books

[Verse 1]
Dead cats and dirty dishes everywhere
Hands in my pants cus I'm itchy there
I'm just came to shame my mother
Ain't never gonna marry Thor's brother now
Tryin' to be a poor man's Gaga (Gaga)
Or an albino Rihanna (eh, eh)
Now I'm dating a French guy, made outta French fries
(Nom, nom, nom, nom, nom)

[Pre-Chorus]
I look just like Tweety
If he was slutty
Gonna give my Daddy
An achy breaky heart attack (sweet niblets)
This is my butt
This is my cooch

[Chorus]
And I won't stop
Chewin' my gum
Tryin' extra hard to be edgy
It's my middle finger to Disney
Freaky hand chop
Pepto-Bismol
This is my musical cry for help
Can't buy a clue with all this wealth, no bones
[Post-Chorus]
It's my booty, I can put it on stuff
It's my booty, I can drag it on the rug
It's my booty, I can put it on Doug
I can put it on a pug or all of the above

[Verse 2]
I could try be classy but what for?
I want to get my face on Mount Slutmore
Remember only God can judge ya
Unless you're busted, then a judge can judge ya
Tryin' to look sexy but it's just sad
Is this an American Apparel Ad?
I'm not anorexic
Just replaced breakfast with crack

[Pre-Chorus: Mark Douglas as Billy-Ray Cyrus]
Now Miley is asleep
Nobody make a peep
Ya'll get up on your feet
I'm gonna show you a cool dance
Everybody clap
Take two steps back

[Chorus: Mark Douglas as Billy-Ray Cyrus]
I'll just latch on
To her hit song
My wife gave birth to a cash machine
Sometimes she lets me be in her movies, cha-ching
[Bridge: Mark Douglas as Billy-Ray Cyrus]
Get out Daddy or else I'm gonna pound you
Don'tcha sass me I can still ground you
For gettin' that dumb Sharon Stone hairdo
I heard you were dating a French dude

[Outro: Mark Douglas as Billy-Ray Cyrus]
Where is he? Stop, Daddy!
I kill you, bastard! Stop Daddy!
Die! He's my boyfriend, I love him!
French fry guy
I hate you!
USA!
(Tasty)