Daddyphatsnaps
Friday The 13th (Axe To Grind)
[Intro]
There's a legend 'round here
A killer buried but not dead
A curse of Crystal Lake
They say he died as a boy but he keeps coming back
Few have seen him and lived
Some of the people tried to stop him
No one can

[Verse 1: Daddyphatsnaps]
A slasher, the best there ever was, skull masher
I'll bash ya, my stature alone, a gulp gasper
You go faster in hopes I won't capture
Got a slow gather but when I go, it don’t matter
You’re mine, I beat you just to hear your bones shatter
With no chatter, I'll decimate your whole chapter
Of horny little teenage individuals
They’re imbeciles 'cause if they kept it in their pants
The soundtrack's unmissable
Unpredictable and causing inexplicable damage, savage
I’m detaching your limbs when I ravage
Grab you out your pyjamas, wrap you up in a hammock
Ram you down like a hammer 'til your brain matter splatters, uh

[Chorus: Bonecage]
I’m a big, dead man in a hockey mask
I like knives but I've still got an axe to grind
Because you killed my mom
I really loved my mama
[Verse 2: Daddyphatsnaps]
Now, Jason, Camp Crystal Lake’s a safe haven
Who praise playing with their private parts
While you’re flailing around the lake, spraying
Drowning? Okay, then
Well, mama started taking their lives as my payment
But I failed you in the end, so now it's time, Jason
Make them fear the fear you that you felt and damnation
Let mama coach you
This is what you do when encountering other humans
You drown 'em and keep pursuing
'Cause mama is disapproving of everything that they’re doing here
Boozing instead of choosing to save you
But now, we’re proving a point by rearranging their joints
Into different shapes 'til it breaks
And deflates mistakes that they've made
These people must pay with a grave
And be slayed too late to be swayed
You're taking that knife and you flay 'em
Hang on the wall and display 'em
You make 'em pay for your mama and how it feels to betray her
The origins of a slayer, blood out each orifice, sprayer
Beware 'cause Jason is here

[Chorus: Bonecage]
I’m a big, dead man in a hockey mask
I like knives but I've still got an axe to grind
Because you killed my mom
I really loved my mama
[Verse 3: Dan Bull]
Whoops! Silly me, I slipped and did a killing spree
Come on, this is thrilling, it needn’t be like drilling teeth
Just think of me like an amateur dentist, pulling fillings free
With a little extra off the top, no fee, this one’s on me
A decent chef will clean the meat off his machete
After cleaving arteries to pieces of spaghetti
Is that a pile of brains or bolognese? I don’t wanna say
We’re all going on a summer holiday (Hahaha)
I'm bettin' you never imagined a vacation
Where Jason’s there chasing, a rather forward form of flirtation
Heart rate racing but not the kind of fellow to make a date with
You should maybe call the funeral director
Make arrangements, Jason’ll aid you to stay adjacent to nature
Getting fucked up in the woods
With one eye, I just made it blatant
If it's not a rapist in a Jason mask, I make it as
I'll be a rapper rearranging Shady’s rap
Flashback to an 80's past
I'll bring the pain back fast and I'll make it last
It's too late when you hear the crash, breaking glass
I'm trespassing in your cabin with my face in a mask
I hack, hack, hack, hack, leave faces slashed
Mowing out-of-towners down, mere blades of grass
I'm afraid you haven’t escaped, there's no way to do that
You’re just my favourite flavour that I've saved 'til last
(Night, night)