He was only a lavender cowboy
The hairs on his chest they were two
He wanted to follow the heroes
And do as the he men do

Red, green, and many colored hair tonics
He rubbed on his chest day and night
When he looked in the mirror next morning
No new hairs grew in sight

He battled for Red Nellie's honor
He cleaned out a hold-up's nest
He died with two six-guns a-smokin'
But only two hairs on his chest