Del the Funky Homosapien
If You Must (Clean Version)
It's important to practice good hygiene
At least if you want to run with my team
I'm 'bout to get into some sh*t that I've seen
This fool's breath forments so bad it'll melt your ice cream
They say don't say nothing if you can't say nice things
Sittin' too close and hear my boy like my eye sting
I tired to be subtle, hand him a stick of gum
I was a victim of breath on the
Running his yap about what sets he from
Gotta get some gum, gotta gets him some
He turned it down, his teeth was brown
Excruciating, boring, it was a new sensation
I had to ask the dope to pass the soap
Cuz his toe had the stench of crustaceans
Or bathrooms in the bus station
He had a can of oh he had some raisins
Amazin'
Head to toe BO, he didn't know
Used to the fragrance
Just as the days went without bathin'
He felt manly and not like a maiden
He had one dread and fungus
Said he worked on people's toilets with plungers
Girls thought the guy (music change) we were with the tongue, yo
So guys take your queue from this little number
You gotta wash your *ss, if you must
You gotta wash your hair, if you must
You gotta brush your teeth, if you must
Or else you'll be funk-ay
To wash up
You gotta wash your *ss, if you must
You gotta wash your hair, if you must
You gotta brush your teeth, if you must
Or else you'll be funk-ay
To wash up
To, to, to wash up
To, to, to, to wash up
To, to, to wash up
To, to, to, to wash up

Now in class you need total concentration
But there's kids in the back holding conversations
Crackin' on each other and neither were poster boys
Both of 'em smelled like the type that soap avoid
Coast enjoyed a leave of absence
One fool's feet smelled like it struck some matchsticks
Brimstone
Girls would never bring him home
I was laughin' and his friend raised his tone and said:
(different voice) Bud, you rolled all over yourself
Yeah, I know some people n your *ss would be submerged
Like you need to do in water cuz you smell like a turd
Want a cap, get some courage your feet smell lurid
But look it up and while you at it get a cup
And squeeze the sweat out your sweatshirt and drink it or gargle
You get our vote for most stinkiest
That n*gga started thinking the shit
Said I was frail, I said he was stale
Under arms is right, undergarments might
Bout the leap out your holy sweats
Then we hold him messin' after this I'm gonna collect
N*gga check yourself, respect yourself
And watch your motherf*ckin' body 'fore your sweatshirt melt
And ready your act of no lady find you attractive
The funk got you captive
You don't need a map, b*tch
You gotta wash your *ss, if you must
You gotta wash your hair, if you must
You gotta brush your teeth, if you must
Or else you'll be funk-ay
To wash up
You gotta wash your *ss, if you must
You gotta wash your hair, if you must
You gotta brush your teeth, if you must
Or else you'll be funk-ay
To wash up
To, to wash up
To, to, to wash up
To, to, to, to wash up
To, to, to wash up

I'll have some , have some soap for my face
A- a- have some soap for my face
A- a- a- a- have some soap for my face
A- a- have some soap for my face (fade until song ends)