[Intro: Gene (G), Louise (Lou), Tina (T), Linda (L), August Scharffenheimer (AS), Samuel Sommerbottom (SS), Downtown Randolph Brackenbrown (DRB), Mr. Fischoeder (MF) & Bob (B)]

G: No wonder the ice caps are melting. This bear is hot
Lou: I changed my mind about having kids. I'm gonna have one. And feed it to this bear 'cause I love him so much
T: He's so cute, but it'd be really hard to get stains off of him
L: Ah, best Christmas ever, Bob
AS: Oh, I want to pet him! I want to pet him!
SS: Yeah, can we have our turn now?
DBR: Thanks again for letting us come, Bob. Get ready for the cuddle bug
MF: You know, Bob, that family of yours, they're lucky to have you
B: Thanks, Mr. Fischoeder
MF: Okay, now you say something nice about me
B: You have pretty... eye?
MF: Sounds like a line, Bob, but Merry Christmas
B: Merry Christmas, Mr. Fischoeder

[Verse: Linda, Linda & Oscar & All]
I can spell Christmas without a "U"
But that would break my heart in two
You can spell Christmas without a "me"
But that would be a tragedy
We need "S" and "U" this time of year
Because
Because we can't spell Christmas without "us"
Because we can't spell Christmas without "us"