They say I have a strong smile, yet a wild heart
Feels like I've been playing the child from the start
I wander through my heart, seems to be the darkest part
But falling in love and gettin' your heart broken's the hardest part
Started from childhood, she was the lovely essence
Now I can't really look at her, runnin' from her presence
And duckin' from affection, 'cause affection got me nowhere
The dark thoughts and bitterness, huh, I'm so there
I'm so aware of love being not what it seems
Lookin' at her, I feel distraught and I wanna scream
Every time I show affection, I just get rejected
I'm not meant for it, I'm a hundred percent hesitive
Deep thoughts in my head, ehh, swim circles
Waitin' for the love in my spirit to lift urgent
The pain, hurt, anger, bitterness, fits perfect
Realizin' that lovin' her is not at all worth it
How could I be just friends or a brother to her
When I would have deep talks and share my lovin' to her
I think I was smotherin' her, just buggin' with her
Cause even the hugs seems like there's no lovin' in her
And I'm under the Earth, I'm tryna reach the oxygen
But bein' with her, it just seems impossible
Distraught my soul is, in thought, I'm soulless
Her face is somethin' that I always focused on
I'm supposed to hold her and comfort her, it's confusin'
I used to find her hugs and love always amusin'
Seems like my heart is takin' lots of abusin'
She makes me thoughtless and completely clueless
And there's a spot in my heart for her
But it's hard to not ignore her
I've had a lot of hurt and blunder
But I find it's impossible to love her